Mello's Worst Nightmare :P
by airo66
Summary: We all know Mello will have gone through a lot in his lifetime. But in this story - while he's still at the Wammy House - something too horrible to describe happens to the poor blonde boy. What is Mello's horrible discovery? Read to find out! :P
1. Chapter 1: Bad Night

Mello woke up in the middle of the night, panting and sweating. The moon filtered through the nearest window to his bed, showering him in milky light. He turned his head towards the light, wondering why he had woke up so suddenly. After a while of sitting, motionless, surrounded with his nest of sheets, he finally stirred, trying to settle himself back into a comfortable sleeping position.

Then it hit him -

"AAaurgh!" He cried, flinging his arms around his middle as a sharp, breath-taking pain struck his stomach. Gritting his teeth, he stared forwards shockedly, waiting in agony for the pain to strike again.

Someone groaned nearby him. Mello turned stiffly towards the noise.

"..M...Mello?" Matt's voice, dripping with a sleepy slur, sounded from another bed in the same room. Mello could see a lock of his red hair, illuminated by a shaft of window-light.

Mello heard him yawn, then:

"Mello? Is that you?" drawled his tired friend again.

"Uh huh," muttered Mello, still refusing to let go of his aching waist.

"What's up?"

"Nothing."

"But...You cried out, didn't you?"

"Y...No. I didn't."

"Yeah...you did."

"You're losing it, Matt."

"No, I'm not. I heard you. You just yelled in pain."

"Did not."

"Did too."

"I did not."

"Yeah, dude, you did. You were all like: 'aaaauuuuughhhh!' " Matt let loose a long and exaggerated moan.

"I did not."

"...You sounded like a dying animal..."

"I did not."

"...It was like you went into labour pain or something..."

"I did not."

"...God, how would you explain that to Roger?..."

"I. Did. Not."

"...Okey dokey, Miss Mello."

"I AM NOT A GIRL."

"You're hair and name speaks otherwise..."

"Put a freaking sock in it - Annie!"

"Ouch!"

"Oh, will you just -"

"Just, calm down, dude."

"..."

"..."

Matt cleared his throat. "...So. About your labor pangs..."

Mello chucked the thing nearest to him at Matt's head.

Matt shrieked and toppled off the bed. "DUDE THAT WAS YOUR ALARM CLOCK!...*sob* Now I'm gonna have a bruise..."

"Suck it up, you sissy!"

"Chicks aren't attracted to black eyes, you know, jerk!"

"They're not exactly attracted to red-headed winers, either."

"...Argh..."

"So who's moaning NOW?" Mello smirked.

"Well, what I just did was just a little groan. You executed this huge, long, desperate cry. And then you were all like: 'Help me pleeeaase...I can't' take it...kill me now...(Matt I owe you twenty bucks)..."

"MATT."

"Okay. Okay. But you did cry out. Just admit it."

"...Hmph...Fine. So I did. I just got a little surprised. Deal with it."

"...Yeah. I've learned not to ask."

"You'd better not tell anyone about this, Matt."

"...Um, Okay."

However, about a minute later -

"Dude, you know we all heard that, right?" another boy in the dormitory piped up.

Mello sighed exageratedly. "Oh, I hate you all." He flopped back down on his bed.

* * *

A few minutes later, however, Mello was rudely reminded of his problem at hand when another strike of agony sprung up in his abdomen. He yelped, like before, and sat bolt upright in bed. Covered in sweat and goosebumps, his breath coming out in shocked little gasps, he barely heard Matt as he called him.

"Mello?"

Mello didn't reply. What was WRONG with him? Was he _sick_? Well, it felt pretty awful...

"Mel-lo," chimed Matt again. "Earth to Mello! Come in, Mello! You there?"

Again, Mello ignored him.

"Mel-_looooo_! Melson? Mel? M-Dog? M-ily? Melly Bell-"

"Matt..." rasped 'M-Dog' in a hoarse voice. "Shut. Up."

Matt, hearing his pained tone, looked over at his friend with concern. "So...what's up?"

Mello looked down at his painful stomach. "...I dunno...But my stomach just...kills. A lot."

"You're stomach is a mass murderer?"

Mello glared at Matt. "Stop being stupid. You know what I meant."

"Yeah...yeah...You probably just have a stomach-ache, dude. You did have a whole lotta chocolate cake last night..."

"Ugh! Don't remind me!...Because now...I'm starting to feel sick...!" He gasped in pain, eyes wide, before running from the room, leaving Matt staring after him questioningly.


	2. Chapter 2: The Next Day

The next morning, Mello was the last to wake up and troop down the stairs to eat breakfast.

He slumped beside Matt, who looked up, surprised. "There you are, Mellanie! And don't _you_ look like a happy ray of sunshine!"

Matt glared at him with his bloodshot eyes, accented with dark lines of tiredness. His face was pale and sallow and he was shaking feebly. "Shut your face, Matteline."

"So, what happened last night, exactly?" Matt took a bite of toast, waiting for Mello to answer.

Mello smirked. "I spent the rest of the night in the bathroom…" He shuddered. "What's _wrong _with me?"

"Well…you know…Roger says you were dropped on your head a couple times as a baby…"

Mello elbowed him (hard), then stared, sickened, down at his own piece of toast. The sight and smell of food at the moment seemed positively horrible…

He pushed his plate away.

Matt blinked. "Not hungry? _You_?" He gave a mischievous grin, and pulled a familiar-looking package out of his vest. "Not even for…chocolate?"

Mello smirked. "No. Not even for choco…uhh…Oh, gimme that." He swiped the chocolate from Matt and tore into it ravenously. Matt smiled and finished his toast.

* * *

After breakfast, the morning went fairly normally. Since it was a Saturday, the kids at the Wammy House didn't have to attend lessons, and therefore played and ran and talked and fooled around all day long.

Mello, at around 10:00 in the morning, was still a bit shaky from his horrible night, but the caffeine and sugar in his chocolate gave him a boost that helped him smoke Matt's team at soccer. And it had only taken him six penalties and three death threats! He really WAS getting more mature!

Puffing out his chest, like the soccer king he was, Mello strutted off the field to go and rest in the shade of the Wammy House…Hmmm….Maybe with some chocolate…

All of a sudden, on the way there – a familiar, horrible jolt of pain made his stomach twist. With a yelp, he fell to his knees, his arms wrapped firmly around his aching gut. He gave a small cough, then a sickening feeling washed over him.

Yet again, he ran for the bathroom.


	3. Chapter 3: Best Field Trip EVER!

These moments of pain and illness occurred several more times throughout the day, until, finally he was sitting, legs crossed, with a bunch of other kids, in front of Roger. He was talking to them about a potential field trip for them to have in the near future:

"Perhaps the Science Emporium…" he said thoughtfully. "Those of you who excel in this fine and silent art should appreciate this greatly."

A girl named Linda raised her hand. "Uh…I don't do science. How about the art museum?"

"Yuck, and stare at nude paintings all day!" disagreed a boy across the room disgustedly.

"That doesn't sound too bad…" muttered Matt to Mello playfully, and Mello smirked at him.

Roger sighed. "Okay…what about the local Historical Gallery?"

"Blech!"

"No!"

"How old _are_ you!"

Next came the kids' suggestions:

"Let's go to Wonderland!"

"McDonalds!"

"The beach!"

"The arcade!" (Matt)

"The mall!"

"The health-food store!"

All the kids stared at Oliver (AKA Organic Olly), who had suggested the last place.

"What? _Health food store_? Seriously?" crowed a guy near the front.

"LA-AME!" chimed another.

Roger looked thoughtful. _Hmmm….Heath-food store…Educational…Sanitary…__Cheap__…._

"All right, kids!" he clapped his hands loudly, quickly getting their attention. "The health food store it is! Back your bags for next Monday! We might be able to stay overnight in the storage unit – and maybe even learn how to make gluten-free flax crackers!"

"NO!" cried the kids.

"Yay!" exclaimed Olly. Someone quickly punched him.

"Great…" muttered Matt, leaning back against Mello, annoyed. "Now we're going to some lame healthy place for our field trip…"

They watched as some kids left the room, and as Roger winked at Olly, who was now grinning at him from under a massive black eye.

"I hate that kid," muttered Mello.

"Jeez, man, who _don't_ you hate?" Matt burst out laughing, and Mello joined in for a moment (sinisterly) – but it quickly turned to tears as a jolt of pain racked his stomach. Without a thought, he reeled over and vomited. Other children cried out in disgust and Roger stared, shocked.

Mello then slumped against the ground, feeling weak and frail and TOTALLY, ENTIRELY SICK.

"Mello…" came Roger's concerned voice. "I think it's time to take you to see the nurse."

Mello stared up at him. _Oh god, NO…_

_

* * *

_

**_The Next Chapter: Mello ventures into the nurse's lair...Will he find out what's wrong with him? :P_**


	4. Chapter 4: Miss P

Okay. Let's review: so Mello's awesome, right? I mean, he's fierce, determined, bold. He's fearless and emotional. He must be the only dude in the world to pull off tight leather pants, and survive a building explosion with nothing but a scar. He also grows up to be one of the biggest pieces in the puzzle of defeating Kira.

Yet, he's brought to his _knees _with the idea of having to venture into the nurse's office and face that insane old witch again…

* * *

At the moment, Mello is being dragged down the hall – kicking and screaming – by Roger and another staff member.

"Let me GO!" snarled Mello in his most feral way. He twisted and dragged his feet, trying desperately to escape. "I don't WANNA go to the nurse! There's nothing WRONG with me!"

Then he twisted around and bit Roger, who dropped him. Mello scrambled to his feet, and was about to sprint away down the hall, when he heard:

"Hello, little boy. Tell me – is it sunny outside, deary?" a frail, quivering old voice squawked.

Mello froze. He turned around slowly. Standing at the end of the hallway, staring at him with sunken, bloodshot eyes, was a pale woman, in her fifties or sixties. She wore a white buttoned top and long skirt, and her grey-brown hair was tied back in a massive knot at the back of her head. _The nurse…!_

Mello stared.

The woman licked her lips.

Mello gave a cry of disgust and shock, but before he could gather his bearings, Roger and the other man had dragged him up to the nurse's door.

Mello, his chest heaving and his eyes wild, was still staring at the freaky woman.

She grinned at him. 100% pedosmile.

Mello screamed in the most manly way possible. Inwardly. He had only ever been to the nurse's office once before. A few years ago, he had gotten into a fight with this boy named Mitch, and both of them ended up having to visit the nurse. She had given them a full-body physical check up –_ the most horrifying and unnecessary one Mello had ever had in his life_ …no details there, sorry (this is, after all, K-rated).

And the creepiest part – nobody knew the nurse's name. She just…seemed to avoid that detail of herself. Like she didn't want to be known if ever she did something illegal and then took off…

Therefore, she was nicknamed Miss Pedo. For obvious reasons.

* * *

_**Poor, poor Mello...What will happen during his afternoon with Miss P? Next chapter is on it's way!**_


	5. Chapter 5: Nurse's Office

_**Mello in the nurse's office...**_

* * *

Mello was seated on the single cushioned seat in Miss P's nursing room. He tried to distract himself from his discomfort by staring at some fuzzy brown substance in the corner of the room and debating wether it was fabric, mould, or…uh…who knows? This was the _nurse's_ office…it could be _anything_…

Mello bit his lip. He was sweating buckets – but not only because he was scared; he was also feeling, still, a bit ill.

Miss P looked him up and down. "You look a tad pale, dearie." She poked his shoulder (which was bare because of the black tank-top he wore), as if this proved her statement.

She sat down in front of him on a stool, looking piercingly at Mello. Mello tried not to blink.

"What are you symptoms?" she croaked.

"None," said Mello, in the most sombre voice he could utter through his quivering lips. "I'm not sick."

"Yes you are de-"

"I'M. NOT. FREAKING. SICK!" Mello snarled.

Miss P blinked. Clicking her tongue, she looked down at her papers and muttered: "Maybe we should check if you're bipolar…"

"I'm not bipolar! I don't have mood swings _that _bad!" As he spoke, however, Mello stood up on the seat, rigid with frustration. "And I'm not sick! I just-" He suddenly became pale. Pain jolted across his stomach, and his mind became fogged with vertigo. Dizzy, he sat back down, mouth agape.

Miss P smirked. Or rather, she twisted up her wrinkled mouth in what looked like a grim smile. "You _are_ sick. Now, symptoms…?"

Mello glared.

"If you don't tell me, this will only take longer."

Still, Mello remained firmly silent.

Miss P smiled creepily and began leaning forwards on her chair. "I have ways to make you tell me…"

"ALRIGHT! ALRIGHT!" exclaimed Mello, shuddering in horror at the grin on Miss P's face. "I'll tell you!" He grudgingly recited her a few of his symptoms.

Miss P then ran a few medical tests by him (each one she had to touch him during, he flinched out of fear).

After a long fourty-five minutes of this (fifteen of which were spent in the bathroom; Mello became sick to his stomach once more halfway through), Miss P finally seemed to have gotten the answer.

She turned to Mello, her head cocked, her lopsided grimace being her attempt at a sympathetic face. "Dearie, I'm afraid you _do_ have an illness..."

* * *

_**Sorry to keep you guys hanging :P**_

_**I just felt I needed to leave the answer till the next chapter O_o**_


	6. Chapter 6: The Illness

Miss P grimaced. "I'm afraid…you're **lactose intolerant**."

Mello blinked. "What's that?"

"You're basically severely allergic to all milk-related foods. Yogurt, ice cream, _chocolate_…"

Mello gaped, and collapsed against his seat. His mind was a whirlwind of horror. Him…allergic to chocolate…No…NO!

"_NO_!" exclaimed Mello out loud, clutching his head. "But – what – wait! I won't be able to eat or drink anything with milk?"

"Well, we can supply you with soy ice cream and milk…"

"G-AAAAAAAHHHHH! No _chocolate_? I'M GONNA DIE!" And, after that very rational statement, Mello fled from the room. He tore down the hall, ignoring the confused glances passing classmates were giving him.

He stormed up to his room and, pouncing onto his bed, began punching his pillow. After a while, he realised that this was not satisfying his anger, as the pillow wasn't being harmed in the least by his blows. Therefore, he grabbed Matt's PSP, and began smashing it against the wall, the floor…

"_DUDE_!" Matt stormed in, pale, shocked and angry. "What the heck are you _doing_!" He snatched the remains of the PSP from Mello, and watched as his bed friend completely broke down – Mello began sobbing uncontrollably, sitting limp on his bed.

Matt sat down beside him, looking confused. "Uh…you still sick?"

Mello glared at him. "No. B-but I just went to Miss P's, as you know, and she told me I'm…I-I'm…I'm _lactose intolerant_!"  
Matt smiled with relief. "Oh, good. For a second there I thought you were gonna say something dangerous…"

"Do you know what being 'lactose intolerant' _means?_"

"Uhh…" Matt grinned awkwardly. "Nope."

"It means I can't eat anything with milk. Which means…n-no…chocolate…" Mello tried to suck it up. He was a man. He could do this. Taking, deep breaths, he straightened his back, and turned to Matt.

Matt looked blank. "Y…you? Without chocolate? That's…that's like cake without icing! Mice without cheese! Mario without Bowser!"

Mello scowled, sad and frustrated. "Glad to know you're taking this seriously."

"I _am_! I mean, if Mario didn't fight Bowser – all he'd be is some fat plumber, with-"

"_Matt_."

"Sorry." He coughed, awkward. "So…what are you going to do now? Chocolate is like, your _signature thing_. Like Near and his toys. And Linda and her doodles. You're like, ChocoMan. The Chocoholic Supreme. We sometimes even call you Willy Wonka behind your back!"

"You do _WHAT_?"

"Uh, never mind. Anyways…So, you're going to have to find something to replace chocolate."

Mello sighed, tragic. "Yeah. And fast."

* * *

_**So what attempts will Mello make to replace chocolate? Next chapter - coming up! ;P**_


End file.
